The song “You Say,” by Lauren Daigle means so much to me and one day when my daughter realizes the impact her life had on my life, she will appreciate each line of the song, because it represents how I think of her. When I hear this song I have the most overwhelming love for my daughter and all she gave me, just by her being her.
She truly gave me back my identity by giving me the courage to find my self-worth. I wanted to be the real-life example of a strong woman that every little girl deserves to have. I wanted her to grow up knowing happiness is important and obtainable because her mommy taught her that through her own life. I wanted to raise a woman who realized that life is short and we only have one chance to enjoy it- for her to never give up part of herself to something or someone who makes her feel like she is never enough. I didn’t want to just tell her these things, I wanted to show her.
I literally fought off voices for years saying I am not enough – some in my mind and some from real people and if I am completely honest I still do get those voices from time to time. But becoming a mom of a girl, reminded me of so much and gave me a sense of purpose that I had not found yet; in her I found my worth and identity.
As she has grown from my little baby girl who changed my life with no words and little action to a little girl who lets me know daily how much I am worth and I believe what she says of me:
“The only thing matters now is everything you think of me
In you I find my worth, in you I find my identity
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don’t belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe
Oh, I believe
What You say of me.
Oh I believe.”
She can sense my insecurities and makes sure to tell me how pretty I am. When she sees me sad or crying, she holds my face and looks me straight in the eyes and tells me I am a great mom and the best at everything.
She says I am her unicorn and she is my sunshine. She tells me I am her best friend forever. And since I know the value of having a mom who is also your best friend, it is an irreplaceable feeling to know that my seven year old values our relationship as much as I do. She reminded me how important having self-worth is.
My goals. My choices. My Work…I do because she believes.
Not to leave out my son. Because he also impacted my life in an indescribable way. He made me a mom. The moment I held him I knew that being a mother was the most incredible gift I will ever receive and I vowed to take the job seriously. He showed me the true reason behind all my dreams and goals. My kids.